I recently took a 6 day/5 night road trip with my husband and two children that saw us drive over 2,100 kilometres and take us to Tobermory, Manatoulin Island, Batchawana Bay, Wawa and Sudbury. I have compiled some of my most random thoughts from the car from this trip.
– I thought Tim Hortons was everywhere? That was easily 226 kilometres between these two Tim Hortons locations. It’s not like I mapped out the distance in between or anything…
– I haven’t seen a Starbucks since Monday morning. I’m in withdrawal, especially since I had loaded another $50 on my Starbucks app last week and I’m just a couple stars away from my next reward.
– why is one ply toilet paper the normal in all these motels, restaurants and gas station washrooms? My God, why are the toilets in the provincial park so damn disgusting? Who smears poop around the toilet seat? And why? Why do that?!
– how many times can my kids watch that one episode of The Lion Guard on my iPad in the car? Don’t they have it memorized yet? Aren’t they sick of it yet? They know what’s going to happen to Kion.
– hold on, that episode of The Lion Guard is in the cloud. How did they get it to play? The iPad isn’t connected to wifi, there’s no wifi in the car…
– who could ever live out here? The sign said “last fuel for 130 kilometres”. That’s a lot of pre-planning you have to do with your life. You’d always have to have a full tank of gas in your car and you could never just randomly head out for a shopping excursion because THERE’S NO WHERE TO GO!
– There’s a lot of signs with Psalms. I’m more of a Leviticus gal as far as that scripture stuff goes… as a non-believer and all.
– Why are there so many signs with religious stuff on them on the highway? I don’t want my kids to read it and then have to explain what it means by “God sent you a message, have you replied?”
– what do people do for fun out here? There’s a heck of a lot of farms and a severe lack of pubs. Or restaurants. OR CHOICES PERIOD.
– why does my daughter want to play this story game again and again? There’s only so many times I can make up a couple lines to an imaginary story. Creativity is tapped when I spend all my time entertaining, feeding, clothing and bathing you.
– the kids are not getting anything out of this scenery. This is like when I was a kid and my parents took us on road trips every summer to the east cost. We stopped at all these historical plaques and my dad was very pleased at what he was showing us. I couldn’t give a rats ass back then and I think my kids are in the same boat right now. Should I stick to taking them to amusement parks and zoos? There’s less driving involved.
– my husband drives too fast. How dare he critique my tailgating? I want to drive again.
– are we there yet? Yet? How much further? OMG I WANT OUT OF THIS CAR!