When You Shouldn’t “Go” There Because Sometimes Life Isn’t Fair

My moment, a chance to escape. I lock the door. My reprieve from the chaos. I make noises like the toilet seat lifting, hitting the tank. I drop my belt on the floor for a dramatic sound effect. I pause in front of the mirror. I thought this expensive lighting was supposed to make me…
Hey – It’s been quite a year. How’s that for an overused opening phrase? 2018 seems to have sacked everyone in some way, shape or form. I am glad to have said farewell to 2018. Last year tested me in a lot of ways. I typically do not bear emotions or “air my dirty laundry” online,…
He knows when I’m weary in the mind from being over worked and over tired. He knows when I am tired in the body from lack of sleep and seriously strenuous gym sessions. He can sense when I can’t bother to put up a fight, when I’ll cave to his demands keep the peace or…
I’ve been a working mother for almost nine years and I think I balance it all okay. File me under one of the “world’s most okayest working moms.” If it wasn’t for the father of my children, I’d be in the category of “mom who enjoys work more than life itself.” Aside from the foggy,…
It’s fair to say that most Canadians have a favourite winter accessory. For some, it’s a snowboard or skis or jacket. Maybe snowshoes, goggles or boots? For me? It’s my collection of toques. And now that it’s FINALLY spring, I can pack them away. I couldn’t be sadder… or happier! Okay, for those of you…
We have no idea how this keep happening, but we gets moths in our house a lot. The big brown ones that land in lamps or fly up your pants or my GOD – into my purse. It’s so bizarre, we live in the middle of an urban area and we rarely see any sort…
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My two oldest children were born in 1999 and 2004. I miscarried in between them as well. Then when my son was only 8 months old I was pregnant again. So I have the 5 year gap and then a 17 month gap. People ask so many nosy inconsiderate questions. Including assuming my older daughter was my child from a previous relationship and my son and younger daughter were my children with my husband. I’m sorry you have had to deal with this as well. I too went off on a few people. It’s doesnt feel good but it’s hard not to sometimes.
Thank you for sharing your story with me, Suzy. It’s good to go we are not alone and “get” each other.
I have a huge gap between my girls. They are 17, 9, & 2. I have received the oddest comments. My personal favorite is the ones that assume that they have different fathers. Obviously that’s the only option. Starting over, a second family, it solves everything in their minds until I say “nope, same dad. Been married for 18 years.” That really takes the wind out of their sails. Then they say things like “ Why would you want to start all over? Do you regret that?” To which I respond, “No. Do you regret any of your children?” About this point they start questioning why I would wait so long between them. It’s a conversation that none of us want to have. It’s something we shouldn’t have to explain. I like to leave it with “My children are happy and healthy. They are well cared for by people who love them. That’s all that matters.” Occasionally people only ask “Do they get along at all?” They have that look in their eyes, just waiting to hear that they fight all the time and resent each other. They’re always shocked to find that my girls are ridiculously close and get along very well. There are perks. My girls have enjoyed being the baby for an extended period. They were very excited to have siblings. It’s sad that we must explain ourselves. It’s horrible for the people who are struggling with infertility and always asked when they are having kids too. Maybe the more of us that speak up the less that people will ask.
You’re right. It is sad we have to explain ourselves. I’m so tired of nosy people who have an opinion on everything from the age gap to how to entertain them together. I’m just kind of at the point where I don’t need to explain anything to anyone anymore.
I completely understand. If I get to my breaking point I always say that they can do whatever they please with anything that comes out of their body and I will do the same.